reunion.

22May08

Only four more days until I see Him. My heart beats and my cheeks flush hot when I think about him greeting me in Manhattan, pulling me close to him and kissing me right there on the street. I’ve barely thought about anything else in the past few days.

All sorts of clips run through my head. Being in his apartment, sleeping in his bed with him, leaving some things and being sort of a regular girlfriend and having a regular boyfriend, even if it does have an expiration date at the end of the summer. I don’t mind lying to myself, pretending that everything is good and wonderful while I can.

He says his romantic life has been complicated and part of him is welcoming the change to monogamy for awhile, but I know that most of him wants to stick with the polyamorous romance we’ve discussed. I know what I want. I know that I’d give up everything to be his girl. Just for the summer, while we’re together in the same city, only a few minute train ride away at all times.

I’m so torn about an issue that I don’t even know actually exists. I don’t know how I feel about it, and I don’t know how quickly things will change once we’re near. All I know is that I better not fall in love this summer.



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